Confessions of a FAT and UNHEALTHY GIRL!!!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Okay, this is VERY hard for me to do, but I need to be held ACCOUNTABLE and this is one way to do it....I'm shaking so bad and have butterflies, but I hope that by me sharing, maybe it will help to inspire you to eat a little healthier so we can be around for our loved ones even longer.

Okay, so I can't hide it anymore, the Reverse Anorexia isn't working anymore (as long as the mirror was only on the upper body and I had no photos, I could tell myself that I 'didn't look THAT bad"), The Alzheimers Bulemia is just flat out not healthy (eat and eat, then forget to throw up).

Well, I got my kick in the butt when I went out to Idaho and was at Pazzles. I'm going to have an opportunity to go to South Africa in October and there is NO WAY that I'm going to be on a plane for almost 24 hours with this huge fat butt and body. It is bad enough that I'm uncomfortable for a 1 hour flight.

Anyway, I weighed myself on May 5th and the scale was at the highest I have ever seen it for me (note: SEEN it, I KNOW I was heavier at some point, because I was wearing pants that were 26 at one point and I wear mostly 20 or 22's now) it was on a 5'4" frame, that is NOT good. In order to be the right height for my weight, I'd have to be something like SEVEN feet tall.

Well, I have now started frequenting the HUNGRY GIRL (LOVE this site btw) website and have rejoined Weight Watchers and have lost 15.6 lbs so far, but even more amazing than that, I have started to cook....I would say AGAIN, but let's face it, I haven't ever really cooked, because I always hated it. Can I just say, I'm an AMAZING cook...whodda thunk? I bought a George Foreman grill and have been having a blast with it and my family (especially DH) LOVES it. It used to be when I cooked I would call anyone that delivered.

Okay, so the whole cooking thing is pretty amazing I know, but get this....I have been going to the GYM. I KNOW, isn't that the craziest thing you ever heard? I'm twice the woman that any of the people that are there are, but that is okay, because I'M DOING IT. Yesterday, I didn't make it to the gym, but I still got on my treadmill at home and...sit down for this, I RAN for one WHOLE minute, then walked for about 6 more, then RAN one more minute. Okay, TRUE, I'm sure it was a scary sight and probably shouldn't have been seen by young children and people with weak stomachs, but hey, it is a start.

WARNING: I'm sharing photos of my 'beginning'. They are NOT PRETTY and if you are in anyway faint of heart...don't look, cuz it is BAD. I'm in a sports bra and shorts. Also, I would have smiled except that they took the pictures so fast, I didn't have time and besides that, DD had to leave for work. Okay, LAST WARNING, I do not look good, but if you really want to see, then CLICK HERE. (OMG, I CANNOT believe that I'm SHARING those with about pressure to keep at it)


Karin Adamczyk said...

OMG Klo you are so doing this. You are doing all the right things and you will get there. Just imagine how good those after a while photos will feel :) And yeah, those grills are great -- they turn out really good food and are very healthy!

You are brave, but more than all of this, you are a wonderful, kind, giving person. It's really tough to have to deal with weight crap. I have my battle with this too. I quit smoking almost 6 years ago and weight gain is natural, but not fun.

South Africa is one amazing goal!!! You will have such a fantastic trip. I envy you!!

Take care,

Schnauzermom said...

Go KLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cooking and working out? I'm proud of you!!! :)

Nancy143 said...

The running part was my favorite. There is a great podcast called Couch to 5K (a lot of people shorten that to C25K) that's free from iTunes. Even if you don't have any type of iPod, you can still play it from your computer, or research it for more info.

You're doing great!! Slow and steady wins the race - and I know you'll get there.

bzyPTmom said...

Hey Klo!! I am soooo proud of you--way to go girl! WW is a wonderful program--I did it for 6 years, lost 50 pounds--yes, it should go faster than that, but we finally figured out the problem--the whole celiac thing made it impossible to lose weight. I had to go off WW--again until my celiac thing is under control. But EXERCISE is the entire ticket to this whole thing--(of course my profession is all about exercise so what dy'a expect!) and keep up the good work. You will feel so much better, have a ton of energy and yes, you can eat goodies on WW, as long as you count the points! My trick--if you exercise you can eat more food!

mignonnie said...

Hi Klo,

You are so open, Klo! Are you slimming because you think you are not pretty, or don't you feel very well physically too? I hope that you will feel better when you'll have lost weight. I think you will feel that already when you loose a couple of kilograms.
Besides that: I see you are carrying a tattoo! What kind of image is it?

Supportive greetings from Mignonnie!

Jette said...

Hi Klo
Thank you for sharing. You have inspired me to type this message, turn off my computer and walk on my treadmill for an hour right now. I struggle with my weight and find it very hard not to eat the wrong things all the time and the computer keeps getting in the way of exercise
Keep it up Klo.... thank you!

kristinlindstrom said...

Way to go Klo!!! I know you can do it! I am also going on a trip to South Africa and should be doing the same thing! I lost 96 pounds with a lifestyle change years ago but reverted back to my old ways and put most of it back on. It is hard work but it feels so good!

Sahm said...

Go Klo!!! As you can see from everyone that has commented so far, we are soooooooooooooo proud of you! You can do it! I also wanted to tell you what an inspiration you are to me and I'm sure many other people! Thank you for barely your soul, so to speak, and sharing your journey with us! This cannot be easy for you, but we are support you!!!! You go girl!!! And thank you for your blog!!!

Klo said...

Thank you so much to everyone for the support. The emails have been awesome...but I'm off to the gym, but then want to come home and do some Pazzle stuff, like a new tutorial or something....*grin

Sue Reynolds said...

Klo I am proud of you! You are such a great person. Can you imagine the energy you will have.....Wow your really going to be SuperKlo! I wish you lived by me so we could walk together. Keep up the amazing work. Oh yeah the cooking thing really saves you money too. I cook for myself so the money saved always goes into my crafts!! GO KLO! Don't for get to scrapbook the journey! We are all rooting for you!
SueR aka HotPaws

Amanda B said...

This is so fantastic! What a way to "pump yourself up and be accountable"! My DH is Hawaiian and weight has been a struggle. (especially when he quit smoking!)I found that the best way he learned to loose weight is with the help of his family. We always get on board with his new diets ex. It is very hard for one person to get fit and healthy when others in the home are not "on board". What a wonderful thing to do for yourself, you will feel so good when you post your next pictures!!! Go KLO!!

Pamela Mosby said...

Good Luck Klo! You CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!

- a fan!

Genesis said...

Go Klo Go! You have nothing to be embarassed about and everything to be proud of! You are doing something now, and its not for yourself-setting an amazing example for your kids and grandkids. Not to mention the rest of us! I'll keep cheering for you-no matter what!

Debra Pate said...

OMGosh Klo!!!! You are amazing! I need to lose weight too, but I could never be as brave as you and post my weight and pictures on the Internet!!! You might have just inspired and given me that kick in the pants that I need! I am so proud of you!!!!

Anonymous said...

Klo, My Bff has ciliac disease and was overweight. She also joined WW, joined the la fitness nearby (which has a load of great classes and support!) She lost a total of about 78lbs and looks and feels like a new person. She says the best feeling is when other people really notice your hard work! As for me, I am still working on it!
Way to go! I know you will do it!

Anonymous said...

Great Job Klo!! You can do it!! I am currently doing something I have never done before and have lost 14 pounds in 3 1/2 weeks!! (long way to go) but remember...nothing tastes as good as being thin feels....or feeling better feels. My blood pressure has dropped and I am going soon to have my bloodwork re done. You are doing great...we all are proud of you. Hugs

Pam Fulton said...

Great Job KLO!!! You can do it!!

Lin said...

Klo you are an inspiration!

Peggy said...

Congratulations Klo on starting your journey! You have the hardest part behind you!

Cathy said...

Good for you and you decision to get healthy! We'll all be your cheering section. You do a lot for a lot of people. You deserve to take care of yourself. One website that I have really been likeing lately is called The chef there has videos for some of the recipes that can be really helpful esp for a non-cook :).

Phoenix said...

OMG Klo. You are brave and amazing. I know you will keep going and I have every confidence you will meet your goal.

HandmadeByDebbi said...

Hi Klo, Congratulations! You are such a wonderful person and so many people love you!!

I lost 96lbs on Weight Watchers and became a leader/receptionist and I think it is the most wonderful, livable plan there is.
I also LOVE Hungry Girl and all the great recipes.
¸.•♥ ´¸.•*♥´¨)) ¸.♥•*¨))
((¸.•´ (( ♥Debbi♥

ScrapbookStudio said...

Klo, I read your accountability statement. As you know, we have simular problems when it comes to our boys. This does not help at all when it comes to our weight. I use this as an excuse when I am upset, sad, happy whatever. You motivated me that I am going to go back to WW tomorrow. I have tried it so many times and failed. I am going to follow you and try to motivate you if you can do the same. And hopefully we will run into each other again. And we will be skinny. Or you can hire me and we can all do it!!!!
Jennifer Pluta
Erie PA

PersistenceUnlimited said...

In order to achieve any goal, one must think positively. Then be realistic with your goals by writing down steps that you can do within a given time frame. Be dedicated and don't let distractions worn you down.

Goal Setting Tips